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"We are all branches of the divine tree of life .... let our leaves blossom as the roots become enriched with the love we share with each other "

— CatherineRebecca


Inspirational Message

29th April, 2012

A way to forgive

We are often told that forgiveness is the pathway to healing. We are told to work on ourselves and let go of all that hurt. It's actually easier said than done, even for those who would consider themselves well seasoned spiritual seekers. To some the thought of forgiveness creates nothing but anger, resentment and pain. Some might say, why should I forgive when this person caused me so much pain. The thing is, who is in pain?

When I was a about 10 years old, I was bullied by a boy. The situation left me feeling weak and humiliated, and it was made even more humiliating by the fact that my mother believed him when he said I had started it. Every time I thought about what had happened I got very upset. Sadly, it took me over 20 years to let go of the situation, for I didn't really know what to do with my feelings of anger and pain. I just kept my feelings to myself and I guess it just stewed within me.

What do I feel towards this person now? well I can say I only feel love for this person, absolute love. I feel no pain inside of me at all, only compassion. So what changed within me?

Well to be honest, I didn't just wake up one day to find all that pain was gone, it actually took a while. One of the things that really helped me, and I recall it being a real turning point, was a heartfelt realisation that actually this person, like me was a spiritual being, and that the beautiful pure spirit of this person would actually never wish to harm me. And as I looked back to that painful time, I realised that actually his life was very sad and unstable. I recalled that his father was an abusive bully who would often hit him and his mother. I recalled that his mother often had bruises on her arms. I knew then that his life experiences had made him the way he was. In that moment all I felt was compassion.

Realising this, I decided to send him and his family all the love in my heart. I would say, I forgive you, I forgive you. I did this when ever I thought of him. Months passed, and one day, I realised that there was no more pain, only love. I also realised that I didn't need anything from him. For all I know he may well still be a bully. All I felt was love.

Sending love and forgiveness has helped me find peace, peace for me, and I know that in some way it has helped him and his family. It has helped me let go of all that pain. Years later I actually told my mother how hurt I was that she didn't believe me. Apologising repeatedly, all she could say was that she didn't realise.

As I have mentioned, forgiveness is not always easy, the path to forgiveness can be damn painful and it can stir up so many emotions. It can make you feel like a little child hiding in the corner. All I can say is that it's worth all the effort. It may well be the most enriching and empowering thing you will ever do in your life. It has the power to open your heart and set you free.

It takes courage to forgive, but you can do it. Try not be too hard on yourself, and allow yourself all the time you need. It might take weeks, months, or even years, but it doesn't matter how long it takes, it's worth it. Remember, you are a powerful spiritual being, and you can achieve anything. Despite all you have been through, you are still here, alive and kicking. You know, sometimes all it takes is a shift in perspective. Sometimes it's just about looking at the situation again through the eyes of love.

It's not always easy to feel love for hurtful people especially if you have to live or work with them. Sometimes simply saying "I forgive you" repeatedly in your head can have a profound affect on your relationship . Actually the words "I forgive you" are very very powerful, and even if you don't actually mean what your saying, saying it continuously seems to change the whole situation.

Every now and again, when I come across challenging people, I will look deep inside them. I keep looking, beyond all the hostility, until I see their beautiful spirit smiling at me. When I see that eternal smile, my heart melts and all the pain seems to dissolve away and there is only love. In that moment I send love and pray that they may feel better in themselves.

Life is a wondrous ever enfolding journey, rich in experience. Take your power back now and choose to embrace life. Choose to walk in the direction of love, for in love, you will truly find yourself. Remember also, that if it not for all the pain you have experienced in your precious life, you would not be who you are, and you would not be here reading these words.

Dear friends, thank you for taking the time to read these words, I hope they may help you if but a little. May your journey be one blessed with love, until the next time.

God bless you